Wednesday, May 16, 2012

A Miracle

I found Ashley's blog, a few months, before I got pregnant with Gabi. I LOVE it!! She is honest, straight forward, and posts about real life. I thoroughly enjoy reading Little Miss Momma.

Recently, Ashley has been posting less and less. Which is totally understandable. She's expecting baby #2. A little boy. And is having a tough pregnancy. I can relate. During my first pregnancy, I'm almost 100% certain, I was sick 95% of the time. It was horrible! There were plenty of days, when I didn't get out of bed. I couldn't stand the sight or smell, of food.

I'm not crazy. I know, that not every pregnancy is perfect, goes by the book, or is some sort of fairy tale. Sals is a good example of that. My poor friend, had 4 tough pregnancies. That left her on a long bed rest. But I'm positive, that she was OK with it. Sals never complained. She was so happy, to be pregnant. Adding to her family. Just like I was, and am.

That's why this post, just shocked me! I mean, really? Not just the post, but the comments. I'm not trying to step on anyone's toes here. But pregnancy isn't that bad. And I'm having a tough 2nd pregnancy too!

Just look at Ashley. She was 29 weeks in this picture. At 29 weeks, I was still having "morning sickness." My hair, was permanently straight and boring. Most of the time, in a ponytail. As I hugged our toilet! I just didn't have the energy to do much more, than wash and comb my hair.

To me, Ashley is glowing! Reminds me a lot, of Anna Marie. They 're all baby! Glowing. Where I was bursting out of my skin. Being a smaller person, I think that just happens. My breasts grew and grew! They were so painful. Before the beginning of my 3rd trimester, I couldn't see my feet. My belly got places, before I did! Most of my shirts, had little holes in them. From me trying to cook, or bumping against things. The fronts would just wear out. But I loved every second of it!! Including the waddling!! :)

I read this post, and just thought. I was a little shocked. Really shocked at the comments. And decided, to put it on the back burner. Come back to it. When I was a little further along, with my 2nd pregnancy. But it's been bothering me. Today, I'm 10 weeks along. Still have almost no energy. Have "morning sickness," almost 24/7. But I could never feel like this...

I guess, everything about this post, and the comments, just shock me!! Since I can remember, I've wanted kids. When Gabe and I were in college, some nights the only thing that got me to study, was dreaming about the beautiful babies we'd have one day. I'm not lying! The entire time that Gabe worked in music, and we travelled the world, I just wanted babies. I yearned to be pregnant!!

With all of that said, and all of the horrible sickness, I LOVED every minute. of being pregnant with Gabi!! And now with our 2nd baby. Even on the days, when I could barely lift my head off the pillow, I wouldn't trade it for a thing!! Now, I just curl up in bed, with my sweet girl. And think, one day, I'll remember this very moment. When I cuddled Gabi, and was growing our 2nd baby.

I love watching my expanding belly, even my swollen feet. It's not just about the baby growing inside. Although, all those flutters, kicks, hiccups, etc. are wonderful! But it's about watching my own body change. You won't find me sporting a bikini these days. But I love how my body gets these soft curves. How it embraces the growing baby inside my belly. Makes all the changes, that are necessary, for this new life.

Even in the late weeks of pregnancy. When heartburn starts up. Cramps are almost too much to handle. Headaches and crazy mood swings happen. When my back is killing me. My breasts feel like they're about to explode. And the nights are just sleepless, because I can't find a decent position, to lie in. Even the very inconvenient shortness of breath. How in the world did Selena do it? 3 small girls, pregnant, and on bed rest, with the twins. She's my hero!

But even with all these "inconveniences," this is the most magical time in my life. I often feel bad for Gabe. Because he doesn't get to really experience all of this. It's an honest miracle. One that I completely embrace. And couldn't ever imagine, not enjoying it. To me, pregnancy is the most amazing experience, that you could ever go through. Even with the bumps, along the way. Even with hours of labor. I still love being pregnant!!

This post, is not meant to criticize Ashley, or her readers. I'm just shocked, at how many women, don't enjoy pregnancy. Enjoy every little part, of this magical journey. To me, there is nothing in the world, that comes close. And nothing in the world, that I don't look forward to repeating. Yes, I said repeating!! Even with the sickness. And the tough days, of taking care of a baby...and dealing with "morning sickness," Gabe and I want more than 2 kids!!